The Rules of Marriage: How to Navigate a Female Led Relationship (FLR) September 22, 2021November 5, 2020 by Preggy to Mommy Source: Pexels In the past, men always took the lead in almost all aspects of life, including work, home life, and social relationships. And society has cemented the mindset that men should be in charge of relationships too. But times have changed; paradigms have shifted. Women are now stepping up, and many of them are doing an excellent job at the forefront. That includes many women fulfilling a dominant role in their female led relationship. However, some men are not yet ready to accept this concept. They feel that their egos will get crushed should they succumb to this relationship dynamic. Meanwhile, other men openly accept the power and leadership of the women in their lives. In this Preggy to Mommy article, we will tackle the concept of a female led relationship. That includes understanding what it is, what it’s not, its types, tips on how to navigate it, and what it means to be in one. A Female Led Relationship (FLR) Source: Pexels A female led relationship or FLR refers to relationships where women act as the authority figure. Here, the woman is the dominant partner, and they lead in terms of making major decisions. The man, on the other hand, is the submissive partner. That makes an FLR the opposite of a traditional male led relationship. One female led relationship differs from another. On one hand, you may see an FLR that has defined gender roles. For instance, in some households, the woman goes to work every day as the breadwinner of the family. The man takes on the cooking, cleaning, errands, and childcare. On the other hand, you may observe an FLR with partners that have no defined gender roles. After all, the essence of an FLR is the leadership of a woman, not the roles themselves. But before we delve deeper into FLR territory, it’s worth noting that communication is necessary for any kind of relationship. Whether you’re in an FLR or a male led relationship, it’s always best to communicate roles with your partner so you could grow and thrive together. Types Of Female Led Relationships There are different kinds of FLR, and they mainly depend on the woman’s personality and assertiveness. We can break down these variations of female led relationships into four different types. Type 1 FLR: Low-Level Female Control For the first FLR type, the woman still has low authority. This classification ensures that both the man and the woman partake in the decision-making process. They discuss the intricacies of each matter, and they weigh the pros and cons together. This FLR type doesn’t have as much control and leadership as the other FLR types. However, it still grants the woman reprieve from traditional gender roles, as it lets her exercise authority in some instances. Still, the main point of this FLR category is that the couple decides together most of the time. And often, authority gets passed between the two of them depending on the situation. Source: PxHere Type 2 FLR: Moderate Female Control In this female led relationship, the woman takes charge of most matters in the household. However, she still draws the line in some issues. This FLR type allows the woman to delegate tasks to her partner. Those may involve work she doesn’t prefer, or something she thinks the man can fulfill better. The woman doesn’t let her pride lead the way. Instead, she exercises her control to ensure the best results. After all, being a woman in an FLR, no matter the type of relationship, means having to assume responsibility alongside authority. Women don’t just get to boss their partners around. Instead, they see to it that their decisions reap favorable and useful results. Since this type of relationship only assumes moderate control, the woman is still often open to suggestions from her partner. However, those instances are limited to matters that don’t overstep her role. Having moderate control in an FLR means relinquishing some control to the man. There are instances where they assume responsibility for that control, but there are also cases where the man may ask the woman to lead more. It’s up to the woman to see for herself if she deems herself fit for the added responsibility. And, depending on how serious or major those additional tasks are, their FLR level may move up or stay the same. Type 3 FLR: Defined Control This female led relationship type is more serious compared to the first two. To put it simply, the woman has taken over the traditional male roles in the relationship. Switching up also means the man takes on the traditional female roles. They fulfill the stereotypical female tasks in the household, such as cleaning, cooking, and taking care of the children. Believe it or not, being in a Type 3 FLR can also entail kinkier and freakier sex. After all, women under this FLR type enjoy having a significant level of authority over their partners. And that often translates to their roles in sex as well. Many of these women take advantage of this power dynamic by kicking bedroom activities up a notch. And if you’re a man in this type of relationship, you may enjoy the more extreme things your partner has in store for you. Outside that private room, the woman also exerts control over other matters like finances, chore distribution, work aspects, and relationship concerns. In this FLR level, the woman’s control is clear. Her areas of authority are defined and laid out to avoid any kind of confusion or overstepping. Source: Pexels Type 4 FLR: Extreme Control The Type 4 FLR affords the woman the highest level of authority over her partner. It’s also the most non-traditional relationship out of all the four mentioned. This female led relationship means the woman treats the man as her slave. Her authority is absolute and uncontested. That extreme control extends to every aspect of the female led relationship, from the major aspects down to the smallest things. That also includes having all the power over every aspect of her partner’s life, like what time he should eat or what he should wear for work. Although some men and women enjoy the Type 4 FLR, it’s not for everyone. After all, it involves the man relinquishing total control. It’s similar to traditional male led relationships from older times when women don’t have a say. But for a female led relationship of this level, it’s the other way around. If both partners don’t enjoy and agree to this kind of FLR, it may lead to power struggles or even separation. That’s because too much control can make the man feel like he’s not valued in the relationship. It’s similar to what many women experience in old traditional relationships. So for this type of relationship to work, the man should enjoy taking on the submissive role. Understanding Female Led Relationships And Its Rules We, as a society, are slowly moving forward while shedding the notion that females should be confined to the traditional woman archetype. And a testament to that is how female led relationships have become more common nowadays. By observation, men prefer living with women who exhibit Type 1 and Type 2 female led relationships. Sometimes, they go for Type 3 as well, but rarely Type 4. But that’s to be expected because as mentioned before, too much control may lead to a broken relationship. Even though female led relationships aren’t new, they can be unfamiliar to many because of our deep-rooted notion of traditional relationships. But confusion is only natural since the FLR concept isn’t that well-known yet. If you’re in a female led relationship or you want to be in one, here are a few rules to guide you: Source: Pexels No Sex On Demand Women in control disagree with sex on demand. It’s been a long-standing issue with traditional relationships that women should always be available for sex when their partners desire it. However, arrangements like a female led relationship break views such as that. Autonomy has always been an issue for women for centuries, so expect that to come into play especially in a female led relationship. Keep in mind that honoring a woman’s “no” is part of respecting her as a partner and as a person. And as the authority figure in the relationship, saying yes to sex without being forced is part of her exercise of control over the FLR and her body. Toilet Seats Should Always Be Down The toilet seat dilemma is one of the most consistent debates between men and women. However, putting the toilet seat down is important when you’re in an FLR, and especially in a female led marriage. In the first place, leaving the toilet seat down is more hygienic. Why? Because everyone should flush with both the seat and the lid down. That has always been the golden standard. So men should keep the seat down and just put it back up when they have to pee again. Let Her Have The Last Say For a female led relationship under types 1, 2, and 3, the man is welcome to speak his mind. Women who are effective leaders know that it’s important to hear their partner’s side when making decisions. However, female led relationships entail men not overpowering women when it comes to the final decision-making. A man in a female led relationship should know that they could trust their partner. That includes respecting her decisions and being confident of her ability to bring good to the relationship. Source: Pixabay She Should Come First Before Anything Else A woman in a female led relationship wants to be prioritized. That’s not to say a man’s world should only revolve around her. Instead, it means making plans with her in mind. It includes not acting like a single man who doesn’t have a life partner. In female led relationships, men should deliver their promises, do their tasks, and follow through with agreed-upon plans. Always remember that in a female led relationship, there is no part-time submission. The man and woman have to give their 100% in all they do to make sure that everything stays on track. After all, that’s exactly what it means to be in a committed relationship. Be Ready For Punishments (And Rewards!) A female led relationship can be seen as an action-consequence type of partnership. That means each good deed warrants a reward, while each bad act awaits a punishment. Being in an FLR requires commitment and respect from both parties, so it’s only fair to face appropriate consequences per action. Needless to say, these punishments don’t involve being hurt. After all, harming a partner is never okay regardless of what type of relationship you’re in. Instead, expect a punishment that befits the misdeed done. For example, if the man fails to honor a major commitment, expect the woman to be upset. It would do them more harm to sleep on the same bed while she harbors anger for him at present. So it would be better for the two of them if the man sleeps somewhere else in the house. Likewise, when the man honors the relationship, his partner will most likely reward him. That may come in the form of a console he’s been eyeing for months, a new watch, or something else he desires. Trust Her Completely Source: Pexels So far, it has been established in this article that most of the decision-making will be done by the woman. With this in mind, the man should show her that he trusts her completely. He’s welcome to ask questions and give opinions regarding her decisions. But he should do so respectfully and mindfully. He should respect the relationship structure and trust that she has the best interests of their relationship at heart. An even greater level of trust should be present in female led marriages. After all, the woman decides not just for her and her partner, but the kids as well. But don’t worry, because as the saying goes, mothers know best. It might be challenging at first. But to help men navigate that emotion, they should start by looking back. Reminisce what decisions she had made in the past and explore its results. Chances are, those yielded positive effects. A good domme knows the ins and outs of what she’s doing, and she’s aware of the possible consequences of her actions. Therefore, respect her and her actions. Do Not Hide Anything Wives know everything their husbands do. That’s a simple fact, especially for a female led relationship. Women often question men regarding what they did on a certain day or who they spent their time with. And sometimes, women do that even when they already know the answer. This isn’t a helicopter relationship. Instead, it’s a way for the woman to know if the man is being honest with her. Honesty is important when it comes to all kinds of relationships. But it weighs more in FLRs because of the history of women being set aside and brushed off in relationships. That’s why men should be nothing but honest and straightforward when talking to their partners. That’s how it should be in relationships anyway. There should be no room for lies and deceit. Source: Pexels When it comes to finances, men shouldn’t hide from women too. If a man wants to buy something, respect the woman’s authority and be honest with her. Men shouldn’t keep women in the dark when it comes to their finances, especially in FLRs. After all, when a woman is in control, she would want to keep track of all expenses properly. By relaying purchases and transactions to her, the man is supporting her in keeping track of important household matters. This then leads to another issue: Men should always tell their partner everything related to women. If he has a new female co-worker on a project, he should tell his partner what she needs to know. That’s an important step in reassuring her that the man is loyal and committed to their relationship. It also gets rid of doubt and prevents possible future conflicts. Just like with a traditional relationship, trust should be non-negotiable in FLRs. After all, a relationship without absolute trust can never thrive and grow. Study And Anticipate One major peeve that a woman may have in a typical male led relationship is the lack of partnership. The traditional male role involves working and providing for the family. However, with the power given to men before, they often fail to fulfill the intellectual aspect of their authority. They work, but they let women handle the expenses. When they get home and offer to help out with household chores, they’re delegating themselves to just the role of assistants. A woman takes full charge of everything when they’re in a female led relationship, and she expects the man to keep up with her. She takes everything into consideration and plans accordingly. In addition, she expects her partner to uphold his fair share of the intellectual load. He should remember what she says to show her that he respects her. The man can’t just be a blank canvas that needs to be filled in every time there’s a task of him. Instead, he should strive to contribute significant input in the relationship by being mindful and present. The man should listen to the woman’s instructions. It’s not enough to let her words in from one ear and out the other. It’s also a plus if he implements something according to her preferences. That shows that he pays attention to her and he’s willing to go the extra mile to make her happy and comfortable. Studying and anticipating is tedious and demanding, but it’s worth it because it sharpens the man’s skills and elevates the relationship. Source: Unsplash Navigating A Female Led Relationship Being in a female led relationship is not all about complete control. Sure, the label focuses on how women take charge in the partnership, but it’s more than that. You may even consider an FLR as a different kind of love. It’s important to understand that women have long been suppressed and limited when it comes to relationships. And FLRs give them the freedom to express their love freely and realize their full potential when it comes to being in a partnership. FLRs can be difficult to navigate, but that’s what female led relationship rules are for. However, it’s important to note that they’re not strict standards. Instead, they’re tips to guide men and women who choose to break free from gender roles. FLRs are also for those who realize that male led relationships aren’t for them. What A Female Led Relationship Means For A Woman A female led relationship is mainly for women with a dominant personality. The woman acts as the head of a partnership or marriage, and she’s in charge of most major decisions. That includes household matters, the relationship, and financial decisions. If she’s married or she has kids, she acts as the female authority for the entire family. To put it in other words, a woman in an FLR is considered the alpha female. Most women in this kind of relationship lead and make decisions that would benefit them, their partner, and their kids, if any. In some cases, an FLR can also mean full authority. After all, in a Type 4 FLR, a man may give the woman complete control. Source: Pexels What A Female Led Relationship Means For A Man For a man, being in an FLR means assuming a traditional female role. It also entails dedicating himself to his partner and shedding off all sorts of relationship ideals riddled with toxic masculinity. The man takes on a submissive role and does things usually expected of women. A few examples include the man raising children, taking over household chores, running errands, and the like. However, it also runs deeper than that. A man being in an FLR means he’s ready to fight all sorts of expectations set for him by society. Men are expected to act tough and nonchalant. However, female led relationships expect them to get over their bad habits and become more mindful and responsible. They can’t continue being responsible for only their personal life anymore. The moment they enter an FLR, they’re expected to fulfill their role and trust their partner. Some men may feel pressured by the expectations of society. After all, it’s only natural to become affected by what everyone has to say. However, it’s worth saying that relinquishing control doesn’t mean a man is any less of a man. It means he’s assured of himself and his relationship to the point that he’s not insecure about being in control. Source: Pexels How To Make A Female Led Relationship Work Mutual respect is the number one reason why female led relationships work. Anyone who enters an FLR must be ready to trust their loved one and be trustworthy enough to be respected back. If you enter an FLR, you only have one partner and you should make them feel your love, respect, and adoration at all times. Like with any relationship advice will say, clear communication is important too. It’s necessary so partners can establish boundaries. It also cultivates mutual understanding and results in less power struggle. Last but not the least, it’s important for both men and women to take responsibility for their respective roles. It’s not enough for only one person to make a relationship work. Both parties should give their all if they’re in an FLR. Relationship responsibilities should also be taken more seriously when it comes to family life. How A Female Led Relationship Differs From A Traditional Male Led Relationship To put it simply, an FLR is a non-traditional relationship. It’s a way for women to take the reins and introduce a fresh perspective when it comes to partnerships. It shuns traditional roles that were founded on patriarchy and the oppression of women so prevalent in the western world. In male led relationships, women don’t have a say in important things like finances and sex. Finally, FLR affords women the chance to be more proactive about those topics. When you’re in an FLR, relationship roles shouldn’t suffocate you. That’s why just like with other relationship types, it’s important to communicate your boundaries and expectations with your partner. A female led relationship also opens the path for a more loving and compassionate union. When men lead, they do so thinking they can’t afford to show any sign of weakness or emotion to their family. But it’s different when it comes to an FLR. Such a relationship allows both men and women to show their emotions, strengths, and weaknesses openly. That way, they can make the best decisions for their partnership. Source: Pexels Final Thoughts Female led relationships are way more than just letting a dominant woman lead in a partnership. It seeks to free women from oppressive traditional roles and it’s rooted in the fight for women’s rights. Women have been silenced for a long time, and FLRs are a testament to the steadily rising success of gender equality. In a woman led relationship, female empowerment is present. But unlike with a traditional relationship, a man being in an FLR doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a say anymore. What it means is he now has a chance to explore other roles that otherwise would have been impossible for him to assume. In a way, FLRs allow men to be soft without being judged. Likewise, FLRs also encourage women to take charge without being mocked. If you’re in an FLR or you want to enter one, more power to you! Don’t let society drive you away from exploring it just because it’s not yet considered a normal relationship. Do what makes you happy. After all, what matters is you have trust, communication, and respect in your partnership.